A Woman’s Killer, Low Self-Esteem

If you’re still old school about certain things like me, how many times do you pick up your average magazine and see the beautiful woman on the cover and say to yourself “why can’t I look like her?”  For me, my moment is when I look at Beyonce. Yet it never dawns on us that after the make-up artist, hair dresser, clothes designer, and professional photographer finishes, we can look just like them too. LOL

Yet we need to deal with something that torments even the most beautiful women around the world, low self-esteem.

Low self-esteem can have a woman do things she shouldn’t be doing, dealing with a relationship she should have discontinued, and even sometimes act bitter towards another woman as you may long for the security she possess.  The truth is low self-esteem is a killer that can cause death in your life!

For example, I didn’t always know my worth.  I was in a relationship where the guy basically needed some deliverance from lust.  Yet knowing he was cheating on me, why did I stay.  Why did I feel like at that time if I didn’t have a man in my life, I wasn’t worth anything?  I found myself in a soap opera, The Young and the Restless, all because of low self-esteem. 

Think about it, when a woman knows her worth, she is not putting up with things for the sake of.  She knows she deserves better than that, and in return she receives better.  Yet that woman with low self-esteem can receive total opposite.  It can stem from cultural backgrounds, our parents, school, etc.  Yet if not dealt with, you can be bound to a miserable time within yourself.

The root is the spirit of rejection.  For those that believe in spiritual warfare, we must bind the spirit of rejection and seek God for deliverance from past hurts that maybe affecting us today!  From the website www.demonbuster.com: 

Rejection

Feelings of being Rejected, Refused, Repudiated, Declined, Denied, Rebuffed, Repelled, Renounced, Discarded, Thrown Away, Excluded, Eliminated and Jettisoned.

Yet what is our sword, God’s word!

 

Proverbs 3:26

For the Lord will be your confidence, and will keep your foot from being taken.

Proverbs 14:26

In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence, and His children will have a place of refuge.

1 John 5:14

Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears  us.

Did you catch that?  Our confidence lies in our God.  Think about it, we serve a God that has rose people from the dead. He has healed so many diseases. He has even resurrected Himself from His own death.  So of course he can heal low self-esteem.  He can heal you from that parent that said you won’t be anything.  He can heal you from that boyfriend that tore you down emotionally.  He can even free you from society interpretation of beauty.  He’s Jehovah Rapha, the Lord our healer.

So I encourage women to go to our God and be free from the bondage of rejection whose symptom is low self-esteem.  There is liberty in Christ.  Get your confidence on in HIM and be blessed!  Stay encouraged.

Stop The Pumping!!

As I entered early morning service, I reflected on the words of enter into His gates with thanksgiving and into His courts with praise.  So why as the minister was speaking, it sounded like he was trying his hardest to get the saints to worship our God.  Why does it appear now we have to get pump up to praise??

Have the saints as a body taken our salvation for granted?  No one should have to pump a saint up in a service especially for praise!  Who woke you up?  Who brought you through?  Who kept you?  Who has been faithful to you? Who gave you that car?  Who gave you that home?  Who gave you that job? Think about it, if it had not been for the Lord who was on our side…..whew.

Saints, I know life has a way of letting us down.  Yes, it’s only human of us to be discouraged from time to time, but there’s power in our praise.  Healing takes place. Deliverance takes place.  Heaviness leaves.  Peace enters the room.  Let everything that hath breath praise the Lord.  You are breathing, right?

So keep this in mind the next time you enter to a service.  Dwell on Psalms 150,  and show up with a spirit of praise and worship. Didn’t His word say where two or three are gathered together in His name, He is in the midst?  I don’t know about you but I need our God to be in our midst.   Nobody should have to pump up a child of God for some praise.  Our God has been TOO good to us!   So let’s step it up saints!  PRAISE HIM!

Time to Let It Go!

My story is different.  I praise the Lord that I was never addicted to drugs or to alcohol, although that doesn’t make me perfect.  Instead I watched both my parents be full blown alcoholics and having to deal the roller coaster ride that comes along with that.  The fighting, having to help my mom into bed while cleaning up vomit, and my dad losing a good job because of it.  Yeah everybody in the club is getting tipsy but no one talks about the next day.  It was those next days that made me not be interested!

Then one day I watched my mom accept Christ right in her living room.  You see at that time, they were faithful partiers, not faithful church visitors.  Praise God for ministry through television.  At first, I thought my mom lost her mind.  I thought the effect of the alcohol has really taken over and now she will need psychological care.  I didn’t understand the transformation that was going on within her.  Then a miracle happened!  I watch my mom take her two best friends, her bottle of alcohol and cigarettes and threw them down the toilet.  There wasn’t an AA meeting (thank God for those) but the power of God that healed her from that addiction.  It was that moment that made me give my life to God.

Although I don’t have an addiction story, I have a hurt story.  See when I first entered church, I thought it would be the one place that would like Heaven on earth.  So when I experienced that some saints acted worse that some sinners I knew, I was devastated.  I will spare the details but the hurt caused me to walk away from God and the next thing I knew, I was involved in things I had no business being involved in, as I knew better.  I went into a state of rebellion due to church hurt.  I ended up cutting myself off from God’s presence, and for two years my prayers just bounced back from the walls.  His grace is sufficient but you don’t want to frustrate His grace! Eventually I received God again but I never forgot that feeling of not feeling his presence.  All of this because of church hurt.

Yet I was never fully healed from that hurt.  I am the type that soon as the benediction is being said, I’m already walking towards the door, as I find myself not wanting to be bothered with church folk.  I praise the Lord and leave.  I want to avoid knowing anyone in fear of that hurt again.  BUT GOD!

It’s funny how God uses things, even twitter to show us things.  I have begun to see that there are truly some sincere saints out there.   There are some that love the Lord and show the love thy neighbor as thyself through their actions.  A simple card when one is down, or letting a person know you are praying for them; it maybe little things but they mean so much.  The act of love is priceless!  I feel led to say let it go.  That person that was your best friend, but ended up betraying you, let it go.  That lie they told out of jealously, let it go.  That man that was saying he was saved and love the Lord but somehow persuaded you to fornicate, let it go. Even that pastor that is supposed to be the Sheppard, but hurt you as well, let it go.

Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled. Hebrews 12:15

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; f he is thirsty, give him water to drink. 22In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you. Proverbs 25:21-22.

I’m sure I am not the only one walking around praising the Lord, but have this deep hurt inside their heart. Yet it’s time to let that hurt go!  Be healed from the hurt in Jesus name I pray, amen!

NEVERTHELESS…

As husband and I were watching Ever Increasing Faith with Pastor Frederick Price Jr., he brought up an interesting word-nevertheless.  It is a term we really don’t use today, yet it awakes you when you hear it.  See what I mean with the following scriptures:

Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security. Jeremiah 33:6

Nevertheless, more and more men and women believed in the Lord and were added to their number. Acts 5:13-15

Nevertheless, each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches. 1 Corinthians 7:16-18

Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man, nor is man independent of woman.
 1 Corinthians 11:10-12

Nevertheless…three words combined to make such a powerful statement!

My mom has been through a trying time.  She has recently experienced having her right leg amputated.  I didn’t know what to expect from her when the doctors first told us the dreadful news.  Yet she said something prevailing, she said they can touch her body but they can’t touch her spirit.  She is YET feeling praise within her through it all.  She doesn’t realize it, but during all this she has inspired me in so many ways.  My mother is a nevertheless type of saint.

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:32-33 

Yes, I wish we could all live a problem free type of life, but the reality is we don’t.  Some storms can come and knock you right off your feet.  Yet do we give up?  Do you blame God?  Do we turn our back on Him?  Or we will be the nevertheless child of God?  Even when we don’t understand, nevertheless.  Even when we are feeling worry, nevertheless.  Even when we are feeling doubt, nevertheless.

As my mom encouraged me, I encourage you to be the nevertheless in your walk with God!

Tired of Trying....

The past two months, I’ve been trying.  Trying to help the best I can with love ones. I’m trying to play peace maker with family members.  I’m trying to be understanding with situations.  Giving when I really don’t have it like that.  Has anyone been there?

The truth is trying can be draining.  There are moments when I just break down and cry, as I feel so helpless.  I am doing all I know how to do and yet feel like I am hitting a brick wall.  Such things like anger, frustration, guilt, sorrow all comes to my emotions.

Yet should we stay being controlled by our emotions?  The word says to stand.

Therefore, take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm (Ephesians 6:13).

 Stand therefore, having your lions with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness (Ephesians 6:14).

So I will yet stand…in the midst of feeling drain, in the midst of feeling angry, in the midst of feeling sorrow, I will yet stand.

So I encourage all that may find themselves in a period of trying to yet stand.  As I encourage you, I encourage myself!  Let’s continue to know our worth; not only as women, but as women of God as well.

Is Turning Back REALLY the Answer?

Reflecting back when the news broke out that Bishop Eddie Long was involved in a homosexual scandal, I remember thinking oh no, how can this be?  Then came such comments like:

“See, that’s why I don’t go to church because of stuff like that.”

“How can he be a pastor of a church and doing stuff like that?”

“That’s why you should just do what you want because the church ain’t living ____.”

Galatians 5:7

You were running a good race.  Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth?

Let’s marinate on the scripture for a minute!  Why do we let another human being actions cause us to turn our backs on true love, peace, joy, strength, encouragement, anointing-our God?

Psalms 118:8

It is better to trust upon the Lord It than to put confidence in man.

The truth is just because a person gets saved doesn’t mean they don’t still yet need deliverance.  Our salvation is a lifelong process, not a one shot deal.  It hurts when a brother or sister cause you pain.  It can be devastating.  Yet that person is a human being, prone to make mistakes.  We have all sinned and come short to HIS glory!

Proverbs 26:11                                                                                                                 

As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.

Marinate on that…do you really want to return back to your “vomit?”  Do you really want to give up experiencing peace in the midst of a storm, joy unspeakable, strength when weak, or encouragement when down?   What is fornication; drugs, excessive alcohol, and clubs are to you?  I call them substitutes.  They only give you a false sense of what you get from God for a short period of time.  And let me remind you, the devil substitutes aren’t cheap!

Church hurt is painful.  The wounds can be very deep!  Yet ask yourself is it really worth me turning my back on God just to return to my vomit?  What better way of the enemy than to get God’s people with church hurt?  You have to admit it’s an excellent strategy. However, instead of looking at the situation, see it as that person needing deliverance and pray for them.  So what does the word tells us to do in these situations?

Matthew 18:15-17

If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you.  If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church, and if he refuses to listen to the church, treat him as you would and pagan or a tax collector.

The best thing to do is try to talk these things out and if things can’t get resolved, keep your distance and keep praying for them.  I myself at 19 didn’t do this.  Instead I caught an attitude and turn my back on God.  The peace I took for granted was gone and it felt horrible!!  It took me two years just to feel His presence again. I do not take it for granted anymore, as not everyone gets to experience HIS presence.    So the next time you may be entertaining the thoughts of backsliding ask yourself, is it really the answer???

Can We Endure Correction....

For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.  For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. ¹⁹ For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. ²⁰ Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.   Romans 7:18-20

Let’s pause for a minute on those scriptures.  Selah.  How many of us can relate to what Paul is saying here?  The battle of the spirit vs. the flesh is real!  It is a constant battle even for us in the body of Christ.

 For example, you have a disagreement with a co-worker, how many of us can say you rather cuss that person out than to still show the love of God to them?  You know you are married, but he/she looks so good that your flesh just desires to have that other person.   How about you are home alone and you know you shouldn’t be looking at porn by yourself, but you’ll sexually arouse and hey, no one will see you looking at it.

Here’s another thought: 

Proverbs 15:3

The eyes of the Lord are in every place, watching the evil and the good.  

Yes, God sees us.  He sees us when we are in the right and He sees us when we are in the wrong!  He sees what we are doing behind those close doors!

 Revelations 3:19

I correct and discipline everyone I love.  So be diligent and turn from your indifference. 

Meditate on that for a moment….

When God is correcting our ways, why do we get mad at Him?  Why can we come up with excuses when He shows us the truth about ourselves?  For instance, I confess I have asked God why certain things have to be considered a sin.  Don’t you know this is 2011?  Yes, I have said it. 

The truth is we all want to cater to our flesh.  Catering to our spirit man crucifies the flesh, and let’s face it, it hurts when we are being dead to sin!  Yet knowing that God is only correcting because He loves, it should makes us want to do right by Him.

John 14:15

If you love me, you will keep my commandments.

I come to find that we can’t just confess our love for God, but we must also show our love towards Him.  As we all have quoted “actions speak louder than words” towards each other, how much more so towards our walk in Christ!

Psalms 29:11

The Lord will give strength unto His people.  The Lord will bless His people with peace. 

Some can be prayed out, some can be word out, and some need prayer, fasting, and God’s word.  What a blessing it is to know that we can call on Him for help with our weaknesses and in return, He will give us strength.  Saints, the world need us to be powerful!  Let’s get our love walks right by confession, repentance, and then seeking His face for change.  Let’s not stay in our flesh with our weaknesses.  It will only lead to spiritual death.  I am learning there is a freedom in obedience, but the road to get there is mighty hard to follow.   Let’s appreciate His correction which is His love!  Stay encouraged.