Fornication, Why Not?

In a world where we have shows like 16 and Pregnant, Teen Mom, and the high percentage of African Americans having abortions, I feel compelled to discuss this topic in the hope it will help someone to make wiser choices.

James 1:14-15 says “But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust and enticed.  Then when lust hath conceive it brings forth sin and sin when it is finished, brings forth death."

Picture it…I was alone, had to pay for it myself, and in a room full of strangers making the most personal decision of my life. Laying on a cold table, just the doctor, nurse, and me. The sound of the vacuum brought tears to my eyes as I realized I was committing murder. The thumb I heard going into a bowl was my child, walking away in a stranger’s hands. Does that sound like sex before marriage was worth it to you?

I am writing this blog for women to make wiser choices with their bodies. But I am particularly concerned with young women within the church. Ask yourself, why do they say wait until you get married?



1. When you have sex with someone, you develop a soul tie. A soul tie is when you link your soul with someone that can have positive or negative results. So if he’s sweet, easy going type of guy, it can be positive. Yet if he is full of anger or lust, that can be negative. Genesis 34:2-3 shows this. “And when Shecehm son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw her, he seized her, lay with her, and humbled, defiled, and disgraced her. But his soul longed for and clung to Dinah, daughter of Jacob, and he loved the girl and spoke comfortingly to her young heart’s wishes.” As you can see, the act doesn’t just stay in that bed, it goes with you! You pick up that person’s spirit. You can find yourself longing for the person, knowing they are not good for you.

2. You also place a curse on yourself…the curse of shedding innocent blood . Under that curse are demons like sadness, rage, envy, hate, rebellion, greed, cursing, oppression, worship of sex, and marriage breaking spirits. Hmmm…is that five minutes worth putting a curse on life?

3. Emotional scars. Yes, it may seem like the easier solution, yet it haunts you for the rest of your life. You will find yourself thinking about that child every year, around that time…how old he/she would have been, where your life would have been if you decided pro-choice, etc. That act never fully goes away.


4. Let’s not forget there are other things that can happen besides an unwanted pregnancy. There are Sexually Transmitted Diseases (STDs). Here is a link for information:   http://www.cdc.gov/std/

So I urge you to know your worth. Giving yourself to a man is the most precious gift a man can receive from you. It is an act of love that fornication turns into an act of lust. Check dude out…Is he really saved? Does he love the Lord? What is his potential? When you look into his eyes, do you see him in your future? How is he on the job front? Does he have an education beyond high school? Do you feel you can depend on him as a leader in the husband role? Does he uplift you or tear you down? Does he make you want to be a better woman, or make you want to settle out of fear of being alone? Don’t allow a man to be your main focus in life. The only man that should be in that role is Jesus Christ! Sex is wonderful when it’s in a Loving, Committed marriage. Speaking from experience I have learned that the hard way. The definition of Insanity is “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result." Why allow a five minute act to cause so much damage. And let’s face it; teen boys are practicing on girls at that age seeing how many women they can get to perfect their act. Are you really enjoying the act? And to get pregnant or catch a STD, or worse, to ruin your life off of a trial run, is it really worth it?

Follow Christ’s way, which is the best way. He doesn’t tell you not to do something because he wants to hinder your fun. In reality, he is telling you so you can experience abundant life. There are many days I wish I just would’ve waited until I got married like the word said. Obedience is better than sacrifice! Yet I must add, due to free will, love yourself enough to protect yourself. And if a guy doesn’t love himself enough to want to protect himself, how much is he going to really love you. THINK!