The Other Side of that Holiday Table..

It was a different table, a different house, even a different setting.  Yet as I looked upon the blessings of the table with the delicious food displayed, it didn’t mask the heart of my grief.  It was at that moment I realized I was on the other side of the holiday table.   No more hearing my mother say “put a little more seasoning on that” or seeing the joy on her face with all her family together. I was trying to mask something that I couldn’t do.  That something was my grief.

As a child of God I know to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.  I know precious is the death of a saint.  We know these scriptures and even quote them at home goings, but to be honest it takes faith to stand on these scriptures when a love one has passed.  Especially if that loved one inspired your life.

Truth is we will grieve.  I never cried so much since my mother transition.  See I gained so much from her wisdom as I got older.  She was yet schooling me even up until her death.  I found myself saying to myself who is gonna teach me now. I have nobody.  Guess what, the Holy Spirit corrected me and said “I’m your teacher, who do you think taught your mother?”  I immediately felt convicted and repented.

I had to be reminded I am never alone.  He said I will never leave thee nor forsake thee.  He said peace I give, not as this world, I give.  Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.  It’s ok for us to grieve, but let’s remember in the midst that we serve a God that cares about everything! That includes our grief.   Every time I call on him, peace immediately hits my spirit.  So no, we are not alone.  God is there to help in our time of need!

I encourage the saints in celebrating during the holiday season; let us remember those who are on the other side of that holiday table dealing with grief.  Prayer is a powerful thing!  Let’s cover one another in prayer that Jehovah Shalom, the God of peace will be with those that lost love ones and are faced with the reality of it during this time of the year.  The reality hurts, but I must confess in the midst of the hurt God shows his beauty from those ashes and I am yet thankful.  It’s just a love that can’t be explained! The key is to remember that the God of comfort is waiting to spread his arms of peace around you within his hug!

Forever Wanting

Look at how the devil has us wasting time.  We get that position we wanted, but now we see a better one.  We get that car we wanted, but now we want another one.  We finally achieved that degree, but now we want a higher one.  We want to feel more special then our neighbor so we show out with those name brands.  Think about it, the road to wants is never ending.  The flesh is never really satisfied.  Yet at the end of our lives, would that wanting road we are on now even be a thought when we close our eyes?

Eternity is what’s truly forever. When you compare our life on earth to eternity, many things begin to seem irrelevant.  Take a moment and search yourself, what have you really been doing to prepare for your eternity? Selah

And now abides faith, hope and love, but the greatest of these is love.  1 Corinthians 13:13

Throughout the New Testament one word is emphasize, love.  Love can cover a multitude of sin. Love fulfills the law, love is patient, we are to love one another, etc.  Ever wonder why one word is stressed so much in the Bible?  God is love.  We have Him within our hearts.  We are to be Christ-like.  We are to be love. Selah

So do we walk in love, or hold grudges?  Do we choose love and forgive, or justify unforgiveness? Do we love our neighbor as ourselves or do we get what’s ours alone?  Just take a minute to think how much better our day can be when we decide to just walk in love.  Notice I said decide to, as there are time we are not going to feel the need to!  Love is part of or eternity. God so loved us, He gave…

Yes, thank God for the job, thank God for the house, thank God for the car, and thank God for the education.  However what does it profit a man to gain the whole world and loose his soul?  What shall a man give in exchange of his soul?  Let’s stop having our hearts in world time and start having our hearts in God time.  I am finding that true success is really walking in love!

Wounded

Memorial Day can be a hard day for some while others just see it as a day off from work. Life journeys are never straight.  Isaiah 45:2 lets us know there are times when the journey will be crooked.  As I was celebrating the New Year with my hubs, I had no idea what was ahead of me just two months later.  I was warned through a dream that death was knocking at the door, I just didn’t know how close that knock was going to be.

My mother was a woman of faith.  I would watch this woman praise God through losing a job, a house, and even close friends.  You would never know by her praise on Sundays that we were trusting God for food or going to the Salvation Army for clothes.  Yet I learn just how real God was through those experiences as we never went hungry and never had to be on the streets.  God kept us.  Yet my mom became my inspiration as she would praise God through it all. Even ‘til the end she would minister to people in the middle of her own pain, she yet worship God although she lost part of her leg, and I was yet able to suck up her spiritual wisdom during our talks.

The month of March came. At the beginning of that month mom ended up in the hospital again.  As usual she was yet praising God in the midst of turmoil.  We were still able to talk with her and pray with her.  We would yet encourage each other by God’s word.  Yet this visit didn’t feel like the others.  One day I came in and mom showed me this scripture:

 Psalms 116: 15 Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints. 

I remember pausing, but then went into the devil is a liar, you are not going anywhere.  Yet it was like my mother knew something that I didn't want to accept.  For years I would watch God heal her, heal the family, she be used as an instrument for healing with others.  I knew God could do it again. By the middle of March, all of the sudden I felt a shift in my prayers over mom.  They were no longer being fully released like I was use to.  I started questioning ok, did we sin?  Why the sudden shift?  The doctor informed me that my mother only had two months to live.  My first reaction was you are not God.  Then I felt like someone came into that hospital room and put their arms around me.  I was overwhelmed with peace.  Towards the end of March, we could barely talk to mom.  It was just pain med and helping her in ways I didn’t think I would ever have to assist her in.  Yet I made the decision to yet stand on God’s word, no matter what I was seeing.  When I would feel overwhelm, that same experience of someone coming in and putting their arms around me would happen which would give a peace unexplained.  By March 29, 2016 my mom transition, but I could yet see the beauty of God in her death.  He granted her desire; she passed in her sleep, in her own bed, with her family as she always talked about.  At her home-going, a  girl we never stopped praying for came and ended up getting prayer and have been coming back to church ever since.

Here is the struggle. 

The bible lets us know we are to rejoice at a saint’s death, and yes we did rejoice at my mother’s home-going.  Yet I found myself feeling guilty for wanting to cry, for wanting to wipe my grief away with carvel cakes, and at times just wanting to be by myself and talk to no one.  God is so good, even in grief.  He used my sweet sister @spreadingjoy to say a statement that stuck with me:  it’s ok not to be ok.  When I saw that, it hit my heart so.  So yes, I rejoice that my mom got her new body with no more pain or sickness.  However the scripture says: 

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds in Psalms 147:3.

 Truth-my heart has been broken.  Mom was only 64 years of age and part of me don’t understand why God didn’t heal another time.  It hurts I can no longer go by the house and just talk with her.  It hurts that I can no longer witness her yet praising God or ministering to people.  I even miss her fussingJ  I am a witness that it’s ok to not be ok.  God sends his comfort every single time.  He uses people, He uses his word, and his awesome presence is the best.   He is yet healing my broken heart, but I encourage all saints that maybe grieving to yet trust in our God. For those that may have lost a love one due to servicing their country remember He will truly give you peace that passes our understanding if you let him!

Prayer:  Father in the name of Jesus, we may not understand but we know all things work together for good, even in moments of lost.  You are the God that comforts.  Comfort all those that maybe experiencing a lost.  Jehovah Shalom, you are our peace.  Saturate our spirits with your peace that passes our understanding.  Heal our broken hearts and bind up our wounds.  We thank you Father that we can cast all our cares upon you, which includes our grief.  We thank you for removing the heavy burdens and destroying all yokes.  We give you all praise in Jesus name we pray.  Amen.

What Do You Want People to Admire Most About You?

Upon my daily devotion, a question made me pause and think.  The question was "What do you want people to admire most about you?"  Makes you think, right?

Jeremiah 9:23,24

Thus said the Lord, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches: but let him that glory glory in this, that he understand and know me, that I am the Lord which exercise loving-kindness, judgement, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight says the Lord.

Look at these two verse again...marinate.

In the society we live in today, knowing God is not honored nor fruits of loving-kindness. It is so easy to get caught up in concentrating too much on worldly goals. Let me explain, do we want people to admire the level of education we have?  Do we want people to admire that prestige position that we may be in? Do we want people to admire that fancy car, house, or designer clothes?  Here's the biggie-will any of that profit us in the Kingdom of God?  Selah

God is not against any of those things, but when they become more important to us than the kingdom in our hearts, then it can be a problem.  See flesh is never satisfied.  Flesh will have going for that higher degree, that bigger house, that fancy car, or the next designer thing.  See flesh will keep you wanting to feel "special", having one up on another person.  Hmmm..sounds like it can open the door to pride.

Matthew 6:33

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and His righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

There is a spiritual nugget right there.  Our hearts need to be set on the Kingdom first, not worldly goals first, the kingdom.  Do you want people to admire the fruit they see you producing more or that degree?  Do you want people to admire your commitment to God or to that job?   Saints our hearts should be towards HIM, towards kingdom first, then all the things will be added.

Proverbs 4:23

Keep your heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.

God is watching our heart in ALL matters!  Even the matters we think are not important.  That question convicted my spirit man and I hope it convicts yours as well.  Saints, lets keep seeking the Kingdom of God first!

LLP

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes. and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world...1 John 2:16

I call this LLP: lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and pride of life.  This scripture is a spiritual nugget for us kingdom minded saints!  It's warning us what can be our down fall.  It can be so subtle yet so destructive to our spiritual man. Yet it bombards us every single day.

You're sitting at work minding your business.  The next thing you know Mr. tall, dark, and handsome with a lovely smile comes your way.  You find yourself starring just a little too long.  Your mind can even go wondering picturing you two as a couple.  What is really this act, lust of the eye.

You know God's word is pretty clear about forgiveness and loving our neighbors as ourselves.  Yet back in 1985, SalleMae did you real dirty and you even find yourself saying things like "but God, I know you saw what SalleMae did".  Then you try to justify why you haven't forgiven her.  What is really this act, lust of the flesh.

You have accomplished something wonderful like earning a degree.  Vanilla tells you he only has a high school diploma.  You find yourself feeling better yourself as you have an advantage over him. You may even look down upon him without realizing it.  What is really this act, pride of life.

I know lately I have been on guarding our hearts, staying humble, and crucify the flesh. No, these subjects are not popular and yes they even cut.  Nevertheless, what do we desire more of? Do we want to experience the fullness of joy in His presence?  Do we want to grow from glory to glory?  OR do we want to cling to the world, cling to our flesh?  The choice is truly up to us!

Saints, we are more within the last days then we realize.  Lets guard ourselves from LLP and stay worshiping in spirit and in truth.  Selah

Be Humble

We all have been there at one point or another in our spiritual walk where we hear someone who we all well respected committed a sin they should have known better on.  We all gasp upon it.  Then thoughts of how they he/she have done that, or I don't understand, or even worse the thoughts of backsliding come in as you feel what's the point after hearing such news. Let's face it, it's not a nice feeling watching someone ministry get effected by the ugliness of sins disguises.

Yet before we are so quick to put our mouths on such issues, here is something that Paul states:

1 Corinthians 11:31

For if we judge ourselves, we should not be judged.

Hmmmmm...if we judge ourselves!!!  We are so quick to tell others not to judge us, but are we really judging ourselves.  I don't know about you but this scripture is humbling to me.  See once you start to judge yourself, the Holy Spirit starts to show you things you may not want to see.  For example, He showed me at times how I express weak faith. This was me -_-

The truth is if God was to come in our homes tonight, what would He see in our spiritual closet?  Would He see complaining, hidden anger, bitterness, lying, or self-gratification?  Hmmmmm.  Would He really see us walking after the spirit so we don't fulfill the lust of the flesh? Hmmmmm.  Like I said, judging yourself makes you humble.

Mark 14:38

Keep wake and watch and pray, lest ye enter into temptation.  The spirit is truly ready, but the flesh is weak.

See if we are not careful flesh could cause us to go straight to hell.  Saints, we got to have relationship from our hearts...not our minds...our hearts.  Let us remember to pray one for another! As Paul also reminds us:

1 Corinthians 9:27

But I keep my body and bring it under subjection: lest by any means when I  have preached to others, I myself become a castaway.

Stay humble!